Personal Testimony - Relationship

 They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death. -Revelation 12:11

There's no doubt about it, your testimony is powerful. In light of that this post is going to be a bit different, this post will be my testimony of God's provision in my life.

Better a meal of vegetables where there is love than a fattened calf with hatred. -Proverbs 15:17

2006 was the second year of fighting depression and was certainly the peak of my battle. '06 may very well have been one of the hardest years that I have faced. I felt alone, I had no reliance in Christ, and I couldn't tell anyone about it. I couldn't, that is, till someone very special stepped into my life.

Brenna was not typical. At all! I don't mean that in a bad way. She is the best friend I have ever had (besides God, of course). I met her in the thick of my depressive state. Several months before I had asked God to re-establish himself in my life, but since I was still living righteousness by works, I fell into the net again. I met Brenna, as I said, during the thick of this depression. She was the first I was able to talk to about my depression - she didn't think badly of me, she just listened. She showed genuine care, concern, and love for me, something that I had never felt in a friend before. She stuck by me even through times when I thought of dieing, and she never gave up. She was truly a blessing. Although I would have preferred someone a little closer than 20,000 miles away, Brenna was the answer to my prayer for a friend.

I had the opportunity that winter to connect with many other christian teens across North America and further through a site Brenna referred me to. The love and encouragement I recieved during these times I will never forget.

I got aquainted with Aimee that winter and boy did I ever not know what I was getting myself into! By now I was begining to see victory from depression and my walk with God grew stronger every day. When I first met her, she told me she was a highschool senior. Now I'm thinking, 'okayy, she must be like 18 by now,' thats cool. Then she told me she was 14! Aimee never ceased to surprise me from then on, be it in her unwitting ability to beat me every time we played checkers, or glimpses of her firmly rooted faith in God. She was like an older sister to me; Aimee mentored me in my spiritual walk, and there was the odd time when I could give her some advice too. No matter where it was I was stuck, Aimee always had some insight that would keep me going for God. She was the main cause of all the spiritual growth I made that winter and in the next several years.

What must be one of the most random of meetings took place sometime in the late of 2007 or early 2008, though I cannot remember clearly when. So I had this account on this totally random site called Tagged, and one day I get this message from this girl, and she's like 'I looked at your profile. Dude it's so cool to actually meet someone religious on here!' and I was like 'dude, I'm totally not religious' and she was like 'oh... I'm sorry' so I was like 'no no no, I'm not religious, I'm relational!'
I didn't know it at the time but Jorden would be the first of any I would meet in person. She actually lived a little closer, only a province away! (what a novelty!)
As the poem which I wrote to her stated, our relationship had a slow beginning. We didn't really start talking till several months later, and after a month of that there was another gap in which we didn't talk for another several months.
But after all that time, we quickly became friends and concluded that we must be long lost siblings.
Jorden was an encouragement. By this time my spiritual walk had grown enough that I felt on a bit of a level to her and many of our conversations were spent simply proclaiming to one another how awesome our God was! Jorden became a very close friend, and one of the first who could personally understand some of fleshly temptations I faced. In May of 2009 I had the opportunity to meet her for the first time.

There is only one word which could describe my first impression of Emma; sporadic. She was one of a few which actually lived in my own town not 5 minutes away. (Imagine that!) Although this was now about a year later, I was hesitant to become involved with Emma. I was afraid that she would detract me from my Walk. She left what she must have imagined were subtle little hints that she wanted to be my friend and in spite of my hesitancy we shared nearly a year and a half together as close friends. I had never known anything like it before as here was someone who was not only close enough, but enthusiastic to be around me alot. Emma impacted my life, even more I suppose, than I have even begun to realize even now.

During a very difficult time of my life, actually just a few months ago, I met Morgan--my other little sister. Morgan was a God-send. I met her while dealing with a major relational dilema, and she walked me through it with her love for me and her unfaltering faith in Jesus Christ. Morgan was one of the most honest people I have ever known, even to the point of losing what meant so much to her. I was touched--rather, clonked on the head--by her devotion and trustability. We have become very close.

There are many others who have been in my life. If I were to write about them all, this post would be incredibly long. I have treasured all of my friendships very closely. These few I have mentioned are a few of those which were more active in my life, but no friend has ever left me unaffected.

One of the most hurtful things which I have received was criticism about my friends. In all truth, I have never met most of my best friends, and yesterday's world condemns today's world for communicating with people halfway across the globe. I personally am proud to say I have friends across the continent. I have Christian brothers and sisters in America, in Europe, and even India. Jealous? ;)

I am forever thankful to God for providing these my friends. I am thankful that through the friends he put in my path, he drew me to himself. I am thankful for all they and he have done for me. This is my testimony.

Simply Christ

Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication -Leonardo Da Vinci

Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ is a child of God. And everyone who loves the Father loves his children, too. -1 John 5:1

"Really? Is it really that simple?" As sad as it is, I hear that a lot regarding salvation, forgiveness, or relationship with God. And yes, it really is that simple. So why is it that people have this idea that God made salvation complicated? The Bible says it simply:  Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you will be saved.

This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, -Romans 3:22

They replied, "Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved—you and your household." -Acts 16:31

That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. -Romans 10:9

"What? All you have to do is believe in Jesus? No club cards? No good deeds?" Thats right. Stop making it so hard for yourself! One reason so many people cannot live forgiven is because they cannot believe it is that simple. Human nature. Charles Mingus once said that, "Making the simple complicated is common-place; making the complicated simple, awesomely simple, thats creativity."

That's not to say that a simple salvation is just the product of an artist's mind--that is to say, not the product of a human artist's mind. God is the artist here and he made salvation simple when he stripped us of our sin and died with it. Simply grace. Mingus pointed out humanity's righteousness-by-works based thinking.

Stop that! Stop making it so hard for yourself! Romans 8:28-38, read it, just ten verses. Here's a little from it.

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[m] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. -Romans 8:38-39

 Nothing can separate you from God's love--Nothing that is, except you. Your personal freedom. But if you twist God's plan of salvation, and you think that it isn't that simple, that there's got to be more, and when you cannot live forgiven simply as God intended, you have separated yourself from the grace He so longs to give you.

It is as Leonardo Da Vinci said it, that simplicity is the ultimate sophistication. We will never understand what God has done for us or why he has done it, but we don't need to even bother getting into that; it is enough that Christ died. It is enough to believe and to confess that He is God. It is enough to accept His salvation through faith.

Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ is a child of God. And everyone who loves the Father loves his children, too. -1 John 5:1

Try God's salvation - it really is that simple.

Worship: Posture of the Heart

“O magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt His name together.” -Psalm 34:3

I grew up in a Seventh Day Adventist church. I don't know how many of you are familiar with Adventism, but in my church, Worship is a foreign idea usually comprising of singing hymns corporately. That being said, you might understand my cluelessness when I listened to a worship album done by worship leaders who were a little more extreme. The final track was just open worship and intercession, I'm hearing things like "We need catchers out there, if you see falling bodies, you're a catcher!" What are catchers and why are people falling over?? Is this even Christian?!

I was equally surprised when, while at one church particularly I saw people, even members of my own family, laying out of the floor, kneeling scrunched over, crying? And then I decided to try it. And I felt what they were feeling, and I lay out on the floor and cried too, and the crazy thing was, I didn't even know why.

Later I saw during worship service, spasmatic people. There was this one fellow that would stand and hold on to the pew in front of him and he would get shaking and the whole pew would rock. About this time I started hearing people speaking in tongues, something which may as well be taboo in my church. The coolest thing was seeing my oldest sister get so aligned with the presence of God, she'd speak in tongues and pray for us. I can't speak for anyone else but I believe she was an influence to all us siblings.

Now if that stuff wasn't scary enough, further down the road I began to see people literally collapsing during worship. So that's what 'catchers' are for. More spasmatic people; shaking, falling over, tongues, lots of tongues. Dancing.

I always felt somewhat distanced in worship, I never could get past all this stuff to really understand what was going on, why were all these people going so crazy? It scared me a bit. None of this was anything like the place I grew up in.

This was just the begining of my journey to discover true worship, and today I am thankful that due to my family I was able to begin as young as I did. But what is true worship? Is it all this flesh stuff.. tongues, dancing, shaking.. do I have to fall on the ground to worship God? No. These are merely things which come of catching a glimpse of God and aligning yourself with the Presence of God. So what really is worship then?

A well-known (not well enough that I remember her name) worship leader said once something to the effect that worship is the created catching a glimpse of the Creator. I believe this is true; if we could not see the awesomeness of the god we worship, how then could we worship his awesomeness? Worship is a result of that little glimpse of God.

All the hype that I saw in worship services outside of my church--the tongues, dancing, shaking, etc.--really held me back, I didn't want to look like that. What I was missing was that these things were all results of worship, not part of the worship itself. You see, worship is not about the music or the band or the dancing and singing, those all add to it, but worship in its simplest form is a posture of the heart, and that's what I was missing.

I recall two of the most beautiful, most intimate times of worship I have experienced. The first is the first time I can remember worshipping, in that little church downtown when I lay down on the floor before God and cried. I didn't know half what I was doing, but it didn't matter, I was posturing my heart. Another moment was fall of '08. I was at a conference and Jason Upton was leading worship. I was just sitting in the back row praying, posturing my heart, and I caught a glimpse of God. Let me tell ya, I didn't get up and jump around, speak in tongues, or anything like that. I cried. I couldn't do anything else.

Worship is the way I posture my heart before God. That means that every day of my life is potentially worship. Worship is being in that secret place with God just to tell him how great he is, how worthy he is, how incredible he is. It's not about the music, it's not about the song, those things just set the mood. It's not about the jumping around or the speaking in tongues or the shaking, the falling on the floor.. those things are just a result of seeing God. Worship is about asking God to open the eyes of your heart to truly see him. Worship is about living day to day in awe of God's majesty. Worship is why the Cherubim and Sephirum are sitting at the foot of the throne singing 'Holy, Holy, Holy' they can't even stop. When I think of worship I think of the song by Matt Redman, 'Heart of Worship'

Verse 1
When the music fades, all is stripped away, and I simply come
Longing just to bring, something that's of worth, that will bless your name

Pre Chorus
I'll bring you more than a song, for a song in itself, is not what you have required
You search much deeper within, through the way things appear, you're looking into my heart..

Chorus
I'm coming back the the heart of worship, and it's all about You, all about You, Jesus
I'm sorry Lord for the thing I've made it, cause it's all about You, it's all about You, Jesus

Verse 2
King of endless worth, no one could express, how much you desserve
Though I'm weak and poor, all I have is yours, every single breath

Will you live a life of worship? It's all about Him.

Make a Habit of Having No Habits [Excerpt]

Here's an excerpt from the devotional

book My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers

MAKE A HABIT OF HAVING NO HABITS

For if these things are yours and abound, they make you
to be not idle nor unfruitful. -2 Peter 1:8

When we begin to form a habit we are conscious of it. There are times
when we are conscious of becoming virtuous and patient and godly, but

it is only a stage; if we stop there we shall get the strut of the
spiritual prig. The right thing to do with habits is to lose them in
the life of the Lord, until every habit is so practised that there is
no conscious habit at all. Our spiritual life continually resolves
into introspection because there are some qualities we have not added
as yet. Ultimately the relationship is to be a completely simple one.

Your god may be your little Christian habit, the habit of prayer at
stated times, or the habit of Bible reading. Watch how your Father
will upset those times if you begin to worship your habit instead of
what the habit symbolizes - I can't do that just now, I am praying;
it is my hour with God. No, it is your hour with your habit. There is
a quality that is lacking in you. Recognize the defect and then look
for the opportunity of exercising yourself along the line of the
quality to be added.


Love means that there is no habit visible, you have come to the place
where the habit is lost, and by practice you do the thing
unconsciously. If you are consciously holy, there are certain things
you imagine you cannot do, certain relationships in which you are far
from simple; that means there is something to be added. The only
supernatural life is the life the Lord Jesus lived, and He was at
home with God anywhere. Is there anywhere where you are not at home
with God? Let God press through in that particular circumstance until
you gain Him, and life becomes the simple life of a child.

God of Mercy

“Today you will be with me in Paradise.” Luke 23:43

Are you overwhelmed by your guilt? Do you believe you are 'too far gone' for God to help you? Look at the criminal on the cross beside Jesus.

But the other criminal rebuked him. "Don't you fear God," he said, "since you are under the same sentence? We are punished justly, for we are getting what our deeds deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong." -Luke 23:40-41

The criminal saw his guilt, he knew that he had been justly punished, he also knew that Jesus was completely innocent. Continueing on to verse 42:

Then he said, "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom."

He asked Jesus for mercy. Had he asked anyone else they would have turned him down, reminding him of the sins he had committed - Sounds like the Old Covenant, doesn't it. But Jesus was even at that very moment, creating a new covenant, giving us mercy. And here in verse 43 are those wonderful comforting words:

Jesus answered him, "I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise."

All that Jesus could offer him was death, but it was death with Jesus, true paradise. The most merciful thing Jesus could do. So what will you do, hanging on your cross today? Will you continue to be condemned by the Old Covenant, or will you ask Jesus for his Mercy, death and resurrection in Jesus Christ? He offers you mercy, free today.

Humility Before God

If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land. -2 Chronicles 7:14

Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death—even death on a cross! -Philippians 2:5-8

He gives grace to the humble. -James 4:6

This poor man called, and the LORD heard him; he saved him out of all his troubles.        -Psalm 34:6